In da Beginnin!   
  Lets me tell ya's the story how da Troll Smokehouse got started eh.
It goes sa-en like dis....
  One day, Lennie, da head Troll en some udder Trolls was sittin by da buck pole in er swampers, drinkin suds ya know. Dryin a piece of moose ear over da fire ya! Anyhows, we was wondrin how ta get da moose back unda da bridge. After we had anuf of da suds we decided to dry and smoke da moose so its lighter and floats back unda da bridge better eh. Anyhows, we was captured by da yooper D.N.R. and dey says "Eh ya cant poach moose here". We's told em, "ell we aint poachin im! We aint got a pot nearly big nuff ta poach a moose eh." So dey take are moose and lock us in da pen in Marquette. They like our smoked moose so much dey make us smoke n dry moose and udder critters fer narly tirdy years befur they let us go back unda da bridge. So dats how we gets so good at makin da jerky eh, en dats also how we picks up dis ere slang. Ya, dem yoopers, dey can jaw eh!                   
This story is a fictional account of the origin of Troll Smokehouse.